Because the deep and profound thoughts that have haunted my brain for the last 6 hours refuse to coalesce into a blog post, I am throwing you a funny bone instead!
A few random bits of absurdity that make up my life.
For example, when I logged into WordPress a short time ago, I was greeted by my stats bar – which shows how people stumbled across my blog.
Those magic Google keywords and phrases they used to get here.
It is a clear snapshot, revealing the topics people are interested in studying…
things like “secret zombie outbreaks”… “Crowds of demonic people”… and “disgusting vaginas”.
Folks inquiring about “Disgusting eye backgrounds” and a “painting of cat on a man’s face”.
I also received visitors curious in “Vacuum cleaning nude”… and being “spanked in a punishment outfit and put in the corner bare” …
There were many other explicit things that I dare not even type.
I’m not making these things up. Seriously.
Sometimes I think Google has lost its marbles.
And Kathleen would blame the strange tags I use, like “boy wearing fairy wings”… but you’d have to have an imagination on steroids to make the Herculean leap from fairy wings to “an erotic experience while riding a horse”. ;)
“You have been online for one year do you wish to get offline and get a life? Options:yes-no-remind me next year!”
I’m curious whether I could actually compose a blog post incorporating all those elements, to satisfy any freak who might pop in.
Hmmmm…. creative writing assignment gone wild!
Anything I find hilarious, bizarre, or fascinating …gets shared on Facebook.
And if we’re not already friends, then your Facebook wall is missing that extra splash of crazy sauce.
Without me to remind you “not to eat your yogurt with a fork”,
where would you be?
Covered in yogurt, that’s where!
Facebook has this great app that I found last year, called Year in Status.
I shared mine for 2009 along with my ruminations about turning 30, but here is a recap of stuff you might’ve missed from 2010:
And for those of you unable to read that tiny font… and don’t you dare say it’s just my eyes! I’m warning you… ;)
My contributions to the Facebook Madness:
And the runner-ups:
So I’ll leave you with this invitation to join me on Facebook, because I need to get outta here!
Before the crowds of demonic zombies, with disgusting eyes and vaginas, come here to paint cats on my face, and force me to vacuum in the nude.
Three years ago, tonight, I was finishing up my Sunflower Fairy Cat painting, and dreaming of spring! I’m excited to plant more sunflowers! 🌻❤️🌻❤️🌻❤️ #tbt #throwbackthursday #sunflower #catart ift.tt/2D2IAPv pic.twitter.com/tOI7arpnuM